Ordinary People

Ordinary people 1. What is dialectic? Dialectic is like grapple people withborderline personality disorder. It explains relational life as full of pus-pull tensions resulting from the desire for polar opposites. Autonomy and Connection It desire to be independent or dependence while simultaneously deficiencying to feel connection with the partner EX Beth and Calvin have the connection dialectic when they decide to go on a vacation together. Conrad has autonomy dialectic after he argued with his mom down stair and went to his room, he destiny to be alone.Novelty and Predictability They manifest in our simultaneous desires for ecstasy or stability in our relationship,- Novelty is excitement, new. Predictability is stable, same r tabuine. EX in the film, Conrad has Novelty dialectic when he met his friend, Jen. The produce, Beth, has Predictability dialectic because she always keeps thinking about endeavors dead was not happened she always thought nothing was happened. Public and offstage It is the tension between how much of a friendship is demonstrated in public and private.EX in the movie, when Conrad when to the restaurant with Jen, he has the public dialectic, he is openness at the beginning at the restaurant. But when Jeannies friends came in the restaurant, Conrad changed his dialectic into Private and does not like to talk at all. 2. System theory Wholeness a principle that states that we can not understand a system by simply picking it apart. An undivided or unbroken completeness or totality with nothing wanting Interdependence dependencebetweentwoorto a greater extentpeople,groups,orthingsEX Conrads dependence between his parents, friends. Hierarchy the organization of people at different ranks in an administrative body * In the film, it does not shew any rank in the family, every one look like in the same rank. Boundaries or Openness a line determining the limits of an area, creating a boundary around each separate system. EX in the movie, Conr ad tell Dr. Berger how he feel about his family and his sadness. Calibration or feedback the process of system move their parameters, checking on themselves and self-correcting. Conrad quit his swimming team because he can not handle his stress while swimming. Equifinality the ability to achieve the same goals by manikin of means. 3. Mark knapps model of relationship. a). Conrad and Jeannie Pratts relationship in the Initiating Stage, they notice each other when they just meet in school. They are also in Experimenting Stage, Conrad called her and want to date her, she accepted it. This mean they understand what they want. b)Ordinary PeopleFamily cooperation is one of the most important things that keep the family running smooth and keeping the family happy. In the brisk Ordinary People written by Judith Guest, she showed that a family cannot function properly without communications and caring of each other. Lack of these things would usually results in family separation. In the refresheds case, it didnt turn out to be a disaster further it turn out to be other happy thing for this family.At some point of the novel, the relationship between Beth and Calvin began to fall apart because of their different personalities. This situation happen after Conrad committed suicide. This problem awaits to hinder Beth because she doesnt want to be reminded of the incident and Calvin always wants to talk about this problem. Whenever Calvin leads Beth to talk about their problems, Beth always asks Calvin to forget about it. Beth is a person who always wants things turn out the way she wanted and if things doesnt turn out the way she wanted she will get mad.On the other hand, Calvin is a person that tries to do his outstrip for his kids because he doesnt have a become when he was little and the most he could do is ask Conrad how are your day? Conrad is Beth and Calvins son. They had another son but he got killed accidently on a boat. Conrad thinks Beth hates him beca use he committed suicide. In the book, Beth and Conrad rarely talks and their mother and son relationship doesnt seem to exist. When Conrad once tried to tell Beth about his swimming meets, Beth just slammed the door and this made Conrad feels sad.Conrad and Calvins relationship wasnt in terms of son and father wasnt that bad. At least Calvin cares about Conrad more than Beth does. I have a problem similar to Conrad where whenever I want to tell something to my parents, they listen but they taket understand the things that Im talking about then when I ask for their opinions they always say do whatever things that you think its right. The reason that I tell my parents something is because I dont understand what do to and they seem to not care and want me to figure out my self. therefore I ask my parents individually, I talked to my father first, he seems interested enough to listen to what I was talking about then when I was done and ask him for his opinion he started to tell me abo ut his childhood and that he always have to make decisions on his own without anyones help. After that I talked to my mother, she is a careful person and she seems to know what do to on everything. I told her my problem and she listened carefully then when I was done talking and ask her for opinions, she gave me her opinions and advices to my problem.It seems to me that not everyone in the family will know what to do but there always will be at least one person that tries to help you like Calvin helps Conrad and my mother helps me. Communication is the key in family. When family communicate, they dont hide things, they let people know what they feel and how someone could help them. It also makes the family closer. If people dont communicate, they cant get things over like Beth does.